Friday, August 8, 2008
Smoke Free 1 Week!
But today was the worst. I'm having a party tomorrow night and my house was in such disarray I started panicking. Then I started cleaning and I got even more hyper-irritable. It just felt like once I got started on cleaning the more work there was to do and I started hypervenhilating almost! Isn't that silly? Anway, the only thing I could think of to calm me down was of course, a smoke. I was so close to running to the store to grab a pack but I stopped. I thought "It's not worth it, I worked so hard all week on not smoking, I can't throw it away". So I had a Fresca instead. And I'll be honest. I wish the Fresca were a Marlboro Light. But ya know, it served it's purpose. I made it through.
I think tomorrow night will be really hard. When I drink I of course smoke and I can't do that anymore. I can't be a "social" smoker. I'm either on or off one way or the other one hundred percent. I don't want to make this a big deal, but I really am an addict. It's the worst!
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